June 12, 2013 § 12 Comments
I’d like to tell you that I won’t run when you come, like most people do. I will not flee, I will not hide.
This is not a proud boast.
I am not challenging you. This is not a threat.
This is just a promise. When we are face to face, I will look you in the eye.
I will not succumb to fear, doubt, regret or guilt. I have none.
I’ve been on the path seeking you for years now. I am waiting for you to step out of the shadow and pursue me. Yes, I have been waiting.
Not because I have seen all I wanted to see; felt all I wanted to feel; or loved all the ones I wanted to love. But because I have known you are going to drag me away, since I was five years old.
I know you wait until some are breaking down and are quite old, before you go down on them. I won’t be either. Make your move. I am still strong in muscle and mind.
I don’t doubt your victory over me. I am sure rather. But if you come now, you will take a warrior spirit along.
See you around.
January 7, 2013 § 15 Comments
Following is a mail i received from a friend a while ago. Makes sense. I thought i must share.
To not know can be the source of all doubts and discomfort, ignorance is bliss? It’s hard to be ignorant and feel blissful. I think one knows all and is ignorant of nothing. Thereby being ignorant of something, which is nothing enabling that one to be blissful. My angst lies in not knowing the answer to the questions in life, primarily ‘who am I?’ , ‘what is my purpose?’ And so on. The questions gnawed at me, exposing my weaknesses. I still don’t know. I know who you are, I feel lost as always as I don’t know me. That’s probably something that rankles me all the time. Dissonance for almost everything. That’s it for the day, I need to find the path. Sad? Happy? I felt complete with you, this whole idea of the world being polychromatic is a sham. People are monochromatic. I’m wrong, I’m right, I see, I don’t see, I don’t know, I know. Nothing and something and everything and anything, all is what all seek. I guess I can think? The illusions created, how far can you actually see through them? Being the self and unified with all the other self’s. Maybe I’m wrong, I worry because I am wrong. To see and feel, to feel without contact. Must be madness, engulfed by the world makes madness negative, me thinks that is. I don’t know, this was a rant. Live fast, run faster. Life’s speedy and a rut to move about.
Pip pip, ma cher,
December 25, 2011 § 6 Comments
This is not a newsletter.
This is not a call for submissions.
This is not an advertisement for planning a trip.
This is not an ancient joke.
Or an exhortation to live each day as if it’s your last.
I don’t want you to pass this on to ten other people because they’re special.
Or because if you dont do it, you’d be cursed.
This is not an invitation to buy real estate.
This is a letter. Dear Joe.
The computer did not fill in your name. I did.
It is adressed specifically to you, and no one is bcc’ed.
It’s not fan mail, either.
Though i did like that piece of poetry you wrote last week.
I’m not after your advice or help or money.
There is absolutely no reason for this message.
I’m sorry if it’s boring, but there is no attachment. Not even a photo of my cat.
No links i want you to click on.
Though i read a book you might enjoy reading.
And i wrote another piece of random poetry titled ‘untitled’.
And there’s this new cafe just down the road that you’d love.
Its just that i’m thinking of you.
I want to know how you are, how your family are, if they’re okay.
What you’ve been doing lately that isn’t on Facebook.
And what did you do on Christmas? Did you go out, get drunk? Or cuddled somoene, in bed?
It sounds needy, yeah. I know you’re busy.
And i dont like to say this.
But if i dont take the risk and make it explicit, you might never know.
I miss you.
So would you take a moment to send a few lines and just say Hi?!